rainy weather.

There's something completely refreshing about getting caught in the rain.

I played volleyball tonight. It was warm. Beautiful with a dash of dark clouds. We got our game in just in time before the clouds opened up. A little drizzle here and there depending which way you looked.

Hopped on my bike and down came the rain.

Since I had just played volleyball and was all sandy and sweaty, I knew a little rain wouldn't hurt me. But I ended up enjoying it.
Enjoyed the splashes, the cool drops and the mess.
Sometimes it's just fun to get messy.
And tonight was one of those nights.

Makes me want to play outside a lot more.

slacker sunday: field of dreams

For me.
It doesn't get any better than this.

i love flirting.

I'm tired of getting my hopes up!

Went out tonight. Guy started talking to me and basically saying how he loved the perfume I was wearing and how he just had to say something because he kept smelling it. Of course I was flattered.

So I decided, ya know what, I'm going to be proactive.

Ended up crossing paths with him and said: If you'd like to go out sometime, you should get my number.

He ended up fumbling over words and telling me that he thinks I'm beautiful but that he's in a relationship. Ya know, I can respect that. I like flirting in general. But so frustrating especially when I wasn't the one to start the conversation.

So boys. If you're in a relationship. Leave the flirting to the single men. It will make all the single women that much happier.

Blog Swap!

Hey everyone! It's me, the Lollygagger. But I'm not here today. I'm over swapping blogs with Alexa at cleveland's a plum. It's my first 20sb swap so be nice. But even more firstly (is that a word?) read below about something I can definitely relate to...a little too much. No, go ahead. Read. I'm not going to tell you how you'll probably relate to it too. And after that go read about my date where I cry before it even begins. No. Seriously. It's true. But first things first, all the way from cleveland, miss alexa!

---

everyone has their faults. everyone has their imperfections. everyone has their flaws.

this we all know is true.

but i have a major one that is causing me to lose sleep - which is exactly what i should be doing now instead of writing this blog post. you see, there's an evil evil woman to which i can blame many things on, like the reason i'm writing this guest blog post for molly instead of sleeping.

let me introduce you to ms. procrastination, the bane of my existence.

ms. procrastination is the daughter of mrs. knowitall and mr. doittomorrow, she's the evil step sister of miss totallytogether and the 2nd cousin of miss independent.

she's a devil woman, but when i was introduced to ms. procrastination in high school we got along splendidly - she showed me how it was ok to wait to the last minute to complete assignments so that i could talk on the phone, chat online or watch MTV longer. it was no harm no foul back then because i was a kid, and sleep was overrated.

it wasn't until college that ms. procrastination really reared her evil head causing me to pull all nighters, make late night kinko's runs and generally lose sleep all together. it was starting to get harder to stay up that late to finish assignments but running on coffee was sooooooooooooo college appropriate.

but now? now that i'm old and 29? being sleep deprived due to that hooker ms procrastination is NOT FUN.

just the other day i called her step sister miss totallytogether to vent and she gave me a piece of advice. she told me to stop hanging out with ms procrastination because it's bad for my complexion and the bags under my eyes - go figure.

but then i realized that miss totallytogether is a homely woman who cross stitches throw pillows with her cat's names on them in her basement while listening to mozart.

i'm thinking i'd rather hangout with ms procrastination who at least knows how to party (with bags under her eyes) when a project is finally complete, always making the deadline mind you.

hey, if it wasn't for the last minute nothing would ever get done - procrastinators unite!

now excuse me while i go to bed.

not what you think.

NOT WHAT YOU THINK.*

Seriously. It's not.

What exactly am I talking about?
The public library.
Yes! The public library!

Did you know that you can borrow DVDs such as True Blood or Always Sunny in Philadelphia?

Did you know that you can rent artwork?

Did you know that video games are taking over libraries with gaming days and nights?

Did you know that you can access newspapers, magazines and online resources for free?

Did you know that you can ask ANY question to a reference librarian, and they will bend over backwards to find your answer. Any!

Did you know that if the library doesn't have what you want, you can suggest they purchase it? (and depending where you live, they often do!)

Ok. So here's the disclaimer now that I officially sound like a PSA. I'm a librarian. Some of these things I didn't even know for the longest time. But now that I do I just want to get the word OUT! I mean who wants to pay for stuff when you can get it for free? Not this girl.

So now begins my advocacy of libraries because they hold a special place in my heart.

Going to the American Library Association conference solidified my love for public libraries. I want to work in one. I will work in one.

And then the possibilities will be endless.**

So what are you waiting for?

Go check out your library!

You just might be surprised.

*This is the Chicago Public Library's current ad campaign for awareness.
**Yes, I'm a newly minted librarian, and while I may sound all idealistic, I'm not naive. I just am extremely passionate about the opportunities the library can bring to ALL people.

slacker sunday: float

One day we'll float,
Take life as it comes.

~ PJ Harvey

100!

It's my 100th post! Woo-hoo!

So all along my plan was to have a give-away for my 100th post. But it's not happening. I realized there's a bunch of stuff I need to do in order to coerce you people to want to participate in the giveaway and right now I don't have the time for it. BUT. It will happen in the near future. I promise.

So. Instead I copied JPP. Well, not copied, but I was inspired by her 100th post vlog. (Please don't hate me!) So in that manner I give you not only my 100th post, but my first vlog AND it's me dancing, if dancing means clapping, snapping and twirls.

Please disregard the preemptive dancing, upping the volume and all 500 claps. I just know how to get down apparently. Because that's what the cool kids call dancing: getting down. And no I don't actually believe you'll make it all the way through, but if you do, you get to hear me pant at the end. Bonus!



If any of you were at the 20sb night of dancing, you got to see this x 100 which I apologize for now. But in all honesty, I wish there were more places where I could just dance like a spazz and have others join in rather than look at you like you're crazy.

So while I realize this song (Matt and Kim's Daylight) is probably overdone in many people's minds, I just can't help but jump up and down when I hear it. And yes. This happens with many songs. Especially when I'm supposed to be picking up my room, hence the beginning of bed making.

And as long as you don't say I look like an idiot, I'm giving you permission to leave a comment. Aren't I nice?

definitely maybe.

I want to believe him.
I just don’t anymore.
Maybe that’s a good thing because it’s getting to that point.
That point where I make a decision I don’t want to make.
Is this what it’s been about all along?

Definitely maybe.

lucky me.

After a long weekend of running around the city, getting excited and learning more about my profession, I was kinda hoping for a better fortune than this tonight:

slacker sunday: ala

ALA conference = Exciting ideas galore!

i saw jesus on a bus.

Now that I'm home and eating a banana flavored popsicle, I'm a bit better. But today was long. It wasn't even supposed to happen that way, but it did. You see, today started the American Library Association (ALA) Annual Conference. And I can already tell that it is going to be one busy busy weekend. This is good of course since I really really want to be a FT librarian. It will expose me to a lot. And I'm ready.

So today I went to two events:
1. Conference 101 - How to make the most out of the weekend
2. Informal Meet and Greet

Both were informative, and I was able to talk to a lot of different librarians throughout the country, including Hawaii (ah, now wouldn't that be nice?!). And I did the whole shuttle bus to McCormick Place and busing back into the city to meet at the Hilton. Yes I'll be running around all weekend, and I must remember to bring my camera because if I see anything like I did today, it will. be. worth it. (Onto that soon.)

So do you remember yesterday when I was twittering and asking what a good font would be for a business card? Guess what? Arrange the day offered to design a simple business card for me if I didn't need anything fancy, and look what I got today (You heard right. One day later.):

(Click on it to see it in its glory*)

That's right. I got this AWESOME, pretty, vintage librarian card and I'm in love with it. I seriously now want to just start passing it out to everyone. And that's right folks. I get to sign it where it says "this card belongs to:" How adorable is that?! So thank you a million times over Arrange the Day. You make being a procrastinator easy.

Now for the pictures that just had to be taken, even if it was just by my old cell phone and the Photo Booth on my laptop.

First up. Photo Booth. Taken from inside a Starbucks.

Yes, that is a man in a neon green cheetah unitard.

Yes neon green cheetah man is in that box.

Now I know Chicago has a lot of street performers, and some you even come to recognize, but I had not seen this man before. He was actually pretty entertaining (as you can see be the crowds). He even put tennis rackets with no strings over his head and swooped them down his body. So yes, a bit of contortionist, but nothing too crazy.

But this next one totally topped off my night. I was exhausted and waiting for the bus forever in the south loop. When it finally came I put on my headphones and spaced out and looked through some conference materials. Then I decided to look up a bit later and who did I see? JESUS!

You see him!?

I wish I could've captured one while he was standing up but he was too far away at that point. He couldn't stop raising his cross so people could see it! He even slung it over his shoulder as he sauntered off the bus a bit later. But. I'm pretty happy I witnessed this. I seriously could not stop laughing to myself because it was awesome to watch people's expressions when they saw him for the first time. I mean, you'd be surprised, wouldn't you? Who thinks they'll see Jesus on a bus? You're jealous, aren't you? You should be if you're not. Just sayin'.

*yes I realize I took away from the design with taking out my email and cell number, but just not looking to be that open here even if some of you already have that email address.

it sums me up.

This is one of my favorite pictures from my trip to Alaska. I don't even know why, but I'm drawn to it. Maybe it's the darkness balanced with the lighter sky. Maybe it's because it's at an airport. Maybe it's because it's a dirty old warehouse. Maybe it's because I love clouds. Or maybe there doesn't need to be an explanation.

Of course I have other favorites from Alaska. That place is just too damn beautiful not to have a gorgeous picture every way you look.

But today.
This one.
It sums me up.

my own double-edged sword.

While this picture really has nothing to do with this post, it makes me happy. The bright colors, the taste of peaches, the feeling of summer. All of this comes to me with it. And right now I could use that sun-shiny feeling.

Because lately, I've been feeling the struggle of not having a FT job. While I do not want to complain or write about it constantly, I can't help the fact that it is a constant in my life. I've jumped back on the cover letter, application sending bandwagon, and that feels good, but I am just so ready. As ridiculous as it sounds I feel like once I have a FT job, I can start living again. (Btw, I know this is false, the whole start living again thing. But sometimes, the lack of it just flattens me.)

But that's its own double-edged sword, too, for obvious reasons. Really I am just excited to start paying off my debt. (Yipee.) But this was my own choice. I wasn't fired or let-go because a company couldn't afford to have me on anymore. I quit. I chose to quit, and while I didn't know the bottom would fall out of the rest of the country, it was my choice.

And I still stand by my choice because in the past year I've traveled to France, Alaska, Montana, New York, Mexico. I've met new friends. I've discovered blogging. I did (am doing again) online dating. I started volunteering. Yoga became a regular week activity. I became more confident. I pushed myself harder. I grew.

As hard as it is now, I wouldn't change anything about this past year.
Well, no, that is a big, fat lie.
If it was up to me, I would have a job right now.
Not a part-time job or volunteering position. A Full-time job.

But as much as I believe it is up to me, I also believe that something else is at work. And the other half of me is telling me to just enjoy it.

So I do.

slacker sunday: fireworks.

A time to celebrate. And my favorite part. The noise.

the 4th.

Is it ironic to say that my favorite 4th of July happened in France? Well, it did. I had a picnic on the lawn in front of La Tour Eiffel with one of my best friends who visited me in Paris while I stayed there. Yeah. It's going to be hard to beat.

Cheese, Bread and Wine? Yes, please!

It's blue because France had just gained a six-month term as head of the European Union. (I believe. Don't quote me on it.) And it sparkled like that on the hour. Swoooon.

Could not get enough of this stuff!

Although you can't tell, this is me jumping in front of La Tour Eiffel.

I was that excited.

Me and one of my besties.

aloha.

Received this vintage postcard from a friend of mine.
If this doesn't make you want to go to Hawaii, I don't know what will.

first dates are painful but shouldn't be.

I've been wanting to do the whole day zero project for awhile now, and I've finally made my list. So while I'm not going to force you to read it here, if you're so inclined to know what I'm hoping to accomplish in the next couple of years, you may find it here, because today is the day I'm starting it. What better time than half way through the year, right? Now onto more interesting things...

***

When I was walking home from a first date tonight, I started to think about all the different kind of first dates out there. There's the "you meet guy, guy gets your number and calls and you're excited" first date. And then there's the "online dating" first date. I've been on both and of course prefer the former because usually there's more excitement than anxiety, but tonight was the latter. And that's okay too because really I just want to get out there and meet some new guys!

My problem is that I always feel crazy beforehand. My pattern goes like this...freak out at home and whine to myself (and, ya know, my twitter peeps) that I don't want to go while thinking of things to not like about the guy. Next. Buck up and go while saying to myself who cares!? And lastly meeting the person and feeling fine minus a couple awkward silences.

So with that in mind, I'd have to say tonight was a good date. Maybe only one lull in conversation. I did have to pay for the tip. Not ideal, but it's not a deal breaker for me. But there was no spark. And since I know the spark can grow at times, I'm always up for going out with someone a couple times just to give it a chance.

But right now I'm not feeling it. While conversation was good, it wasn't exciting. We are very different which I think can be good at times, but other things need to make up for it in my opinion. If I really like someone I can look past differences, but when that liking needs to grow it's a bit harder.

I love sports. He'll watch them, but not really into them. I love to travel. He doesn't like to fly. (To give him credit though he does travel. I think it's just the actually flying part.) He has a cat. I'm allergic. And while these things are minor, they are still things that make me hem and haw about the situation.

Yes yes I realize it's just a first date. I really try not to have expectations in these situations, but it's kinda hard not to, especially since I'm really ready to date again. So I guess that's good. I'm back out there. It'll get easier, and then I'll find someone who likes me and me him. And if this guy asks me out again, I'll go. I think it's important to figure out what attracts you to people and all that good stuff. Plus, it's good practice.

But honestly. I'm really ready for some excitement. And laughing.
I want them both, and I really don't see myself settling for less.
And to think this guy's a comic sketch writer.
Maybe that humor will come out on a second date?
One can hope.